Ughhh. I’ve had the biggest problems with my WiFi this week. Which has caused me to not be able to post really much of anything on this site. I could view stuff via my phone and did my best to at least view a few posts here and there. But I feel bad I wasn’t able to watch any things movies or shorts I said that I would. Mainly because I don’t like watching movies on my phone unless I have seen it before. TV shows are fine, but for me it feels weird watching a movie on a screen smaller than my laptop. So since, the net wasn’t working I bought a whole slew of flicks over at the pawn store. I also did see one new film in the theater, which may be my last time going to see ones when they are brand new, This is part one of a two post section mainly because I don’t have a lot of time to really write on every movie I saw. But lets get to the ones I have seen
Lords of Dogtown
On the first episode of ScreenTrax podcast We listed our favorite soundtracks of all time and one of my buddies listed this as his favorite. I took a look at this film, and knew it mainly because it was director Catherine Hardwick’s follow up to Thirteen. Now I loved that film and thought she captured the feeling of a girl that is torn between not wanting to be an adult but not really knowing how to handle it. I thought Lords of Dogtown was about kids who were surfers, but were not good. They become skateboarders, and became legends. Well, they did start a trend of doing the more fancy tricks skateboarders do today, but there was really nothing going on with any of the characters. One sequence I found slightly odd was when a brother and sister were getting it on with their lovers in the same room. I shared a room with my sister for several years and there was no way we were going to have any of that in our room. Heath Ledger is in this but he was so unrecognizable, I thought it was Jake Busy
Donkey Punch.
This Australian thriller was billed as being Dead Calm meets Very Bad Things. At least, that’s what it said on the DVD. There was nothing funny or suspenseful about any of this flick, and it was really difficult to like any character in this movie. It follows there three girls who while on vacation decide to go out to sea with a group of guys they hardly know. As the day progresses, a few of them take drugs , and have sex. One of the guys hears a story that right when your partner is about to climax. You punch her hard in the back of the head, and it will paralyze her. He tries it with one of the girls and it kills her. What follows next is the remaining girls becoming trapped and the guys not wanting them to tattle. I would have bought into this a little bit more if the whole group started off as friends and this was something that happened to an already established couple. But by making these guys random, you already put them in the villain side, and it would have been much more effective to see what would happen if they were all friends faced with this type of situation.
How to Marry a Millionaire
The only Marilyn Monroe movies I have seen are Some Like it Hot, The Seven Year Itch, and he small cameo in All Bout Eve. In this comedy, she teams up with Lauren Becall and Betty Grable as three models who take over an expensive New York loft in order to land a rich husband. it’s plot is quite predictable, with the three finding out that true love is worth more than money, but it was still fun. Seeing this would have been a blast in theaters because it was in CinemaScope and the widescreen looks amazing. I even love that it opens with the orchestra playing the theme live before the movie even starts. Oh, and is it just me but in every movie I see, Marilyn always ends up falling for the very geeky guy in the movies I see. It’s easy to see why a lot of men fell for her back than because I sure did.
The Lego Batman Movie
Right from the very first frame, I was on board all the way through. Why Can’t D.C.’s live action movies be as good as this. I know this won’t be nominated for an Oscar because it came out way too early, but it’s in my wheelhouse to be. I loved it.
Harvest Lake
A group of young attractive people go to a lake for a weekend of sex, booze, and more sex. One of them finds a plant that possesses the mind and make them all very horny. It ends with one of the most insane group sex scene that involves a plant. I’m just going to let you ponder that. I watched this mainly because it starts Tristan Risk and if you google the movie and see the images of her, you will know why I wanted to watch it. The style reminds me a lot of something David Cronenberg(Videodrome) and Johnathan Glazer(Under The Skin) would make. It has a good sense of style and tone and although I didn’t love it. I have to respect it
Razor Blade Smile
This one is about a vampire who also poses as an assassin. The lead girl Ellen Daly is quite hot and was kind of fun to watch her disprove certain myths and lores about her kind. The action is a bit weak but I’m willing to forgive that because it was made on such a short budget. I urge you to watch the video on display from Good Bad Flicks. It delves into much more of the story, and gives you some nice behind the scenes tidbits
I will be back in a few days with part 2
The Vern's Video Vortex. 
Good luck with fixing the WiFi. Not seen any of those. How to Marry a Millionaire I might watch. Hopefully I’ll have something to say about the films in your Part 2.
it goes off and on. I plan to do more work on the site on weekends and that’s when its the worst. thanks very much Chris
I have to give you major props – I’m sure there has never been such a varied bunch of movies in one post before! Kind of awesome. Good luck with the damn wifi.
Its working great now Lets hope it stays this way through the weekend